We finally have our little girl home! She came home a week before Christmas, so we did the obligatory Christmas pictures. People keep asking me how I feel, if I feel different somehow. Other than having issues balancing taking care of a kid and working from home, Seth and I don’t really feel different. I think we just waited and planned for this for so long, finally bringing her home was just natural – it was just right. We are very happy to finally have our little girl home and we can’t wait to watch her – and our family …
We finally found our daughter! Anyone who knows us or follows this blog knows that our adoption journey has been a long and difficult one. But we are so happy to finally announce that we have found our daughter! Meet little Zofia! As a blogger and now a mommy blogger, I am still wrestling with how much information to share about her. I am a pretty open person and I love talking about my life in China and the adoption process, but this isn’t only my story. Where does my story end and Zofia’s begin? I’m not sure, and I …
The following was originally published in the Shenzhen Daily.  One day, your parents are gone. Your home is gone. You don’t know where you are. You are in a new, strange place. There are other people around you who seem nice, but they are not your parents. There are other children in this place. You cry and cry and wait and wait, but Mommy and Daddy never come back. Sometimes the other children disappear from this new place. Sometimes the caretakers leave and new ones arrive. You have trouble trusting or bonding with anyone because you never know if they …
I had only been in China for a few months the first time someone told me I could buy a baby in China. I had told one of my new friends at our school in rural, northern Hunan about my dream of adopting a child in China. “Why bother with that?” she asked. “Just go to the countryside and buy one for 10,000 RMB.” This suggestion is one that I have heard repeatedly during the years I have lived here. I make no secret about our desire to grow our family through adoption, and most people I meet, while curious, …
If you haven’t heard of Rachel Dolezal, then you are one lucky duck. Dolezal made international headlines last week when it was revealed that she, a White woman, had spent the better part of a decade masquerading as a Black person and was even the chapter president of the Spokane, Washington branch of the NAACP. What really captured people’s attention, though, was her rationalization of why she did what she did and the fact that she claimed to “identify as Black.” Since Dolezal’s story came out soon soon after Caitlyn Jenner revealed her true self on the cover of Vanity Fair, …
As any reader of this blog or anyone who has ever met us knows, our dream is to adopt a baby here in China. We finally took that first step and submitted our initial application, which was approved last week! Yay! That was probably the easiest step, though. I was immediately given about 50 more forms to fill out before we can start our home study, which is a whole other thing. But we are just taking it one step at a time. Adoption, especially international adoption, is an expensive way to grow a family. And we have additional hurdles …
Dear Ms. Thompson, Every day, women are told that they can only ever be truly happy if they give birth to a child. It is everywhere – from our own mothers, to politicians, to religious leaders, to books, movies, and TV shows. No matter what else a woman has in her life, no matter how many kids she may have through adoption or marriage, no matter whether she might not even want kids, the idea that women can only know true happiness by forcing another human being out through her vagina is force-fed to us every day. I started reading …
If you’ve never been to China, you probably haven’t heard the term “American-Born Chinese.” It is a uniquely Chinese phrase used to identify people who live in China of Chinese ethnicity but were born abroad, often truncated as ABC (or BBC for British-born Chinese or CBC for Canadian-born Chinese, and so on). In America, we don’t have a quite equal phrase, but we do have something similar, Chinese-American, used to identify American citizens of Chinese ethnicity. Every ethnicity in America can use a hyphenated identity if they wish (African-American, Indian-American, etc.). I’ve been wondering why China and America seem to have …
My boss was kind enough to surprise me and the other American copy editor at the newspaper with a Christmas lunch a couple of weeks ago. As usual, I get asked why I don’t have kids. The question “why don’t you have kids” is something I am asked almost daily in China. In China, it is a given that people who are married have a kid, usually within the first year of marriage. Anyone outside of this norm is weird, local or not. Personally, I find the question “why don’t you have kids” invasive and down right offensive. It is …
While walking to the subway with two of my coworkers yesterday, I had the following conversation: Sarah: Why do you live in China instead of Thailand? Me: Well, my husband and I are planning on adopting here in China. Sarah: Oh, is that very difficult for foreigners? Me: Yes. It is very difficult. It takes a long time and is very expensive. Julie: It’s like buying children. Me: *eye-roll* Sarah: In China, we don’t understand why someone would want to raise someone else’s child. Me: Well, it is just a different way of thinking. I wouldn’t be raising someone else’s …
PAGE TOP